Confessions of a 36 year old Cardiac Patient...

So I don't have to repeat myself over and over on the phone to family and friends and so all of you fellow bloggers can stop wondering what my "mystery" problem is...I've decided to post an update on my condition. Saturday night of Conference Weekend I headed off to the ER for chest pain and shortness of breath that had been bugging me off and on since the previous Tuesday. I was given tests and admitted to the cardiac ward of Scripps Encinitas. After EKGs, cardiac enzyme tests, nitro, oxygen, the "oh so lovely" morphine dose, and observation- I was released Sunday afternoon with no answers except something was wrong. Last week I was given an echocardiogram at the dr.'s office and saw my cardiologist today. The echocardiogram came back normal, which means I do not have any valve problems. This week I will be having a chest CT for pulmonary embolism with IU contrast, as well as an Exercise Myocardial Perfusion Test (yes Rob, you can laugh at my big words). What we do know is that I have diastolic hypertension...in other words, my heart is working too hard and is causing me to have chest pain, shortness of breath, plus I'm really tired (which is highly annoying for a mother of four who also has a job). What we are trying to figure out now is WHY. My cardiologist has put me on a high-blood pressure medication which should make my chest pain feel better, but will also make me even more tired. What fun! SO...hopefully we will get this figured out soon. Thanks for all your sweet thoughts and prayers. ***By the way...is that a great picture or what? Rob and Rachel came to see me in the hospital so Rob and Matt could give me a blessing and so Rachel could cheer me up by making me pose for cheesy pictures.

My Sweet Amanda

So I hope you will all forgive my for my little rant/rave/pity party post earlier this week. I can't tell you how much my spirits were lifted by all your sweet comments. One of the reasons I was having such a hard time is because of my sweet sister Amanda. She is a beautiful, fun, charming, amazing mother of three of the most gorgeous children in the universe. She is also married to an addict. Her husband has been battling addiction to prescription pain meds for four years now. He is currently in detox and will soon be heading off again to rehab. I grew up with three sisters and we are incredibly close. Amanda is the sister just younger than me...the golden girl of our family who was born after my parents lost a son to stillbirth. She has the cutest dimples and is so fun to be with. She is one of the most loving people I know. To have to watch her endure this trial is heartbreaking. Amanda has decided to share her journey on her blog. If you have any words of wisdom for her or have been through a similar situation, or if you simply would like to offer her your support-feel free to visit her blog. I love you Mo...and I amazed by your strength. ***The other reason for my bummer week I will post about soon. It is just a health issue of mine we're trying to figure out. I'm still waiting.

Run Cute Boy...RUN!!!

This year Spencer decided to join the Cross Country team at school. Having inherited his athletic (or should I say, UNathletic) gene from me, we were a little surprised and very happy. He practices twice a week and has a meet every Thursday afternoon. Luckily, Rachel is there to cheer her son along as well-so the boredom of sporting events doesn't overwhelm me! I'm a fan of my kids, but not a huge one of sports-so watching their games/events if a bit of a sacrifice on my part...but enough about ME! At the first meet, it was hotter than h***, so I was very proud of Spencer for toughing it out. I was a little worried about how he would feel about coming in very close to the end, but he just smiled and said, "I did it! And I wasn't last!" I love this kid. If only we all would have a little more of that attitude about life. I think sometimes we hold back from trying new things because we think we won't be very good at it, but you know what? All that matters is that we try. Way to go Spencer.***Thank you all for your kind words and prayers. My spirits were lifted. I will update you all as soon as I have further details on the situation. Still waiting.

Just One of Those Weeks.

Do you ever have one of those weeks that everything seems to be hitting at once? I'm feeling a little overwhelmed with various things that are happening right now (details to follow). I was trying to think of something fun to post about and couldn't. The silly stuff seems trivial compared to stuff I'm dealing with. Why is it when life seems to be moving along great, that you are hit with trials? I know that's why we are here-the purpose of our mortality-but sometimes I'd rather life just be fine and dandy all the time. I think the most frustrating part is the waiting. I'm sort of in a holding pattern with things and I would rather just be faced with it and be able to deal with it, rather than wait. Also, someone very near and dear to me is going through an unimaginable hardship and there is nothing to do but offer lots of love and prayers. I know this makes zero sense to all but a few of you-but it's my journal and this is my life. Sorry for the pity party.

I Know a Weenie Man...

Well, he's more like a boy..or a little man...ANYWAY, my cute Jake told me a couple of weeks ago that he was running for Student Council THAT DAY. I asked him if he had to give a speech and he casually said, "Yea, I already wrote it". Gotta love the self-sufficiency of the third child! About 20 kids in his class ran, and he and another boy made it. He came home that day so excited and told me he was going to run for Vice President of the school. Go Jake! We decided that the most important part of a good campaign is making it memorable. So we went with the slogan "DON'T BE A WEENIE, VOTE FOR WEENIG" complete with a hot-dog theme. On my trip to Palm Springs, I ran across this hot dog hat and brought it home on the chance that he would actually wear it. Well, this boy was game! We made a poster with the help of big sister Hailey and practiced his speech. I was so proud. There were seven kids running just for Vice President. He came THIS CLOSE!!! The principal said it was the closest race he'd seen between Jake and the winner. Jake's just fine because he still gets to be on the Student Council and he's already planning next year's campaign for President. Gotta love him. Good job Jake!!!